Understanding more what it's like to be a teenager again. Independence -- what a lure. Not ungrateful for all kindnesses -- far from it. Just...I want to do it myself. People with disabilities more comprehensive than mine must feel this more profoundly than I am. Independence -- what a lure. Totally alone -- totus solus? Something very tempting about that. I'm getting it now. Ahhh...alone.
Hmmm. One of my friends, an introvert (meaning not that she's quiet tho she is, and not that she's antisocial because she's not, just in the way she processes information: by herself first, then presenting it to others)...she said once: I need a lot of down time.

We all need down time. Time to ourselves. But it could be the apple in the garden. Ya gotta come back to the marketplace. I long to go to the marketplace. Thank you so much, dear neighbors, for calling on your way to Giant and stocking my fridge with food. I am eating so well because of you. But I long to go to Whole Foods and stand in the produce department, savoring the green beans and mushrooms, test-touching the canteloupe, eyeing the blueberries. Staring at the olive bread as if it were hewn by Michaelangelo.

I am trying a few steps with my clunky support sandal on.

http://orthoinfo.aaos.org/topic.cfm?topic=a00181 told me how best to use the collapsible cane. Standing upright at the sink not hunched from the knee scooter, remembering my mother washing the dishes after her left leg amputation (she called it her Standing Time)...I smile remembering her.

Creator and Sustainer of all, loving God, thank you for all of your blessings.

Dependence and independence. All ok.  Now for a short-step walk to the kitchen for a 2nd cup of coffee.

6/17/2012 Sunday - Happy Fathers' Day to the dads in our lives and the dad-like guys.